Attempt 2,165,837 at quitting smoking

Hello creepers....

I am preparing to quit smoking tomorrow.

This is far from my first time quitting. I've quit many times and tried it a different way every time.

Sometimes I use the nicotine patches, sometimes I don't (usually when I'm quitting because I can't afford tobacco that week)

I usually always figure out a replacement hobby or action that I use instead of smoking a cigarette.
The first time I ever quit was for over a year. That time I used the patches for 9 weeks. This is when I started collecting Pyrex. Thrifting was my replacement action.

Since that first time I've quit dozens of times, once for 7-8 months, but most times for only 2 weeks to  a month and a half. I've used shopping...any kind of shopping as my replacement. I've used food (and, I mean MASSIVE gorge fests here). I've used gum, candy, suckers....

The last time I quit was for about a month and I used the gym and working out as my replacement. That worked pretty good....until it didn't.

This time I have no cash for patches, or shopping. I managed to make myself buy a bag of dum-dum pops and jolly ranchers to use this weekend. But, other than that it's a cold-turkey go at it this time.

Why am I quitting this time? Well, it's being initiated because of my Atlanta trip next month to my parent's house. My sister lives with them and she quit smoking 7 months ago. I either know they'll not allow me to smoke while I'm there or I will cause my Sis to relapse while I'm there if I am allowed to.

The point of this is.......I've felt different health-wise for 3 months now. I can feel my weight problem and my smoking changing my body. Probably in a permanent, non-reversible manner. I've continued to smoke anyways. I quit once two weeks ago for ONE FUCKING DAY! I smoked a cigarette that night before I got home from work and blamed it on a traffic ticket ...

I've always said to my family ... "I do bad things, like smoke, eat badly, drink nothing but coffee and diet Dr. Pepper. But, I would stop them ALL in a SECOND if I became sick or knew I had no choice but to or my health would suffer drastically"

Well, Bridget. Here you are! You're here. You are slowly becoming mildly ill and your health will suffer drastically if you do not stop. So, why the hell haven't you?